Wednesday, March 11, 2009


Three words grabbed my attention today as I read God's Word: "city of refuge". I'm wanting to go hide out there right now.

God's Word tells me in Hebrews 6:18-19 that Jesus is my "city of refuge" and those "who have fled to him for refuge can have great confidence as we hold to the hope that lies before us. This hope is a strong and trustworthy anchor for our souls."

Hiding in Him again today.

Yesterday we found out that Dad has acute renal failure, or kidney failure, to add to all the other complications and conditions. A specialist has been called in to attend to my Dad.

As I shared my heart with a friend the other morning, I told her how the Lord is giving me strength while I'm at the hospital, but I come home and collapse in tears. She reminded me of a song. It is my story right now.

Please pray today as I'm fighting anger...and struggling with the 'why God' and 'where's God'. Needing to know I am not alone.


Lysa TerKeurst said...

Sweet Friend,

Thank you for your honesty this morning. This is one of those times that you have to utter the words, "God is my provider," even when you don't feel it- or feel Him.

The truth is He's there with you- with your Dad- and he is providing. The tough thing is that God sometimes provides in ways that we don't like- ways that don't feel like provision at all. That's why it is crucial to stand on the truth- proclaim His truth- and take our honest heart cries to Him.

Tell him what you are feeling Joy. Let it all out. God is big enough to handle it all. Then ask Him to help you see the small things to be thankful for and rest in that provision.

Sending you hugs from afar.

Love you friend.

Beth E. said...

Lysa said it all. I add my heartfelt AMEN to her comment! I am praying for you Joy, especially today, and I continue to pray for that miracle your dad needs.

Love you,

Lori said...

"Cast all your anxiety on him, because he cares for you."
1 Peter 5:7
I loved the song... He's there to pick you up, Joy...You are His child. Let it all out to Him and put all of your trust in the LORD. He will not forsake you. He's your fortress, your rock to cling to.

Lori - Mesa, AZ

Sita said...

"God is our REFUGE and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way, and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging."

As I read this, God spoke to me heart.."this is for Joy.."
As Lysa said, tell God exactly what you feel..that is a refuge where you are completely free to let it out..and when you are a gentle whisper, He will minister...
Upholding you,
Love, Sita

Paula (SweetPea) said...

I love this that song. I have it on a CD. It is so good to be honest with God. We can't hide our feelings from him anyway. We might as well spill it and share our anger with Him. It is so hard to feel Him during these times of not understanding and being angry over the injustice of what is happening.

Praying God provides your every need and removes this anger from your heart.

Yolanda said...

Sweet Joy,

This is how my days were lived as well with my Mom's pancreatic cancer. God gave me so much strength around my family, but when I was home, late at night....then the tears were shed.

I love ya!

Carol said...

Dear Joy,
That song is one of my all time favourites! I have sung that publicly and privately when I've had to cling to the Lord and singing the words, "I WILL trust You Lord, I WILL trust You" helps you to live it!

I am praying!!

Julie said...

I understand your words, your questions, your anger friend.... I truly do... He does too. He's OK with the questions, anger, struggles. He will wrestle with you until you find that Solid Rock on which to stand...

I love that song. It's one of my favorites. I remember listening to it when it first came out... wow that was a long time ago.

You are not alone.... we stand alongside you...but most importantly, HE carries you.... I know, for He carries me too.

Love and Hugs!

Marilyn in Mississippi said...

I am really without the words to say. In my human-ness I wish I could just "fix it" for you and your family! But that's not my job. And thank goodness because I would make a mess of things! I read a poem on another blog today that was so good. Can't remember all the words but it said something like this:
"Keep asking Him to change things--just don't tell Him how. Keep asking him to answer prayer---just don't tell Him now"
That really spoke to me. I have had several medical tests run this week and am having problems myself with leaving all the results in the hands of our God. But I KNOW, I Know, I KNOW that He has our best interest in mind!

Love you sister!

Amy L Brooke said...

I am still praying for you!

elaine @ peace for the journey said...

Good to talk! Love u. Indeed, God is our refuge. Let him take you there tonight.


B His Girl said...

Joy, I know the Lord is offering you refuge under His wing. Let Him cover you with His feathers. He loves you and your dad. I pray for comfort, peace, and healing for your dad. B

Catherine said...

Standing here beside you sweet friend. Loving you, praying for you and lifting your family before the throne of grace many times each day. God understands your hurt, your questions, your cries, the 'whys' and so much more. Curl up in His arms friend and tell him everything you're feeling. He loves you and He knows the plans He has for each of you. Love you. Call me or night. xoxo

Rena Gunther said...

My heart aches for you, my Sister.

I cannot grasp what you are going through, but I am praying that He who does will surround you and be your refuge.

Praying for you!

Much love!

The Real Gal said...

A powerful message. I appreciate your transparentcy. Blessings!

Cheri Bunch said...

Sweet Joy,
I pray that the morning has greeted you with peace for this brand new day.

I pray that His sweet presence will be so real to you that you will feel like you are in a bubble of protection. I woke once again in the night and prayed for you and yours. I feel that the Lord is blessing me to join Him in intercession for you.

This morning I read Psalm 138:7-8. I want to share it with you.

"Though I walk in the midst of trouble, You will revive me; You will stretch out Your hand against the wrath of my enemies, and Your right hand will save me. The Lord will perfect that which concerns me; Your mercy, O Lord, endures forever; Do not forsake the works of Your hands."

Loving you through!