The Lesson of "All things" continues

Questions. Unanswered questions. Pain. Anger. Confusion.

Where was God Wednesday evening around 5pm when precious little Maria Chapman was struck and killed accidentally by a car driven by her brother? God could have intervened in countless ways. The car could have unexplainably stopped. He could have allowed her brother to see her before it was too late. He could have kept her from being in the pathway of death. He could have acted in a number of miraculous ways - and yet - He didn't. Why?

God's plans are not our plans. Can we possibly see the truth of "all things working together for good" in the face of such tragedy? I try to reason God's plan in this. Maybe little Maria's life would have held a devastating diagnosis. Maybe she would have rejected salvation or wandered from the Lord. Maybe her life would have held addiction, alcoholism, abuse and God was sparing her tremendous hardships. For these reasons, her death is a little easier to understand - but, I don't know that any of this would have been true. I'm writing my own story around her life, trying to guard myself from the coldness that wants to envelop my heart towards a God who would be that cruel to a family who devoted their lives to serving and honouring Him.

I cannot begin to imagine their grief. My own tears have flowed, unchecked, spilling from a heart overcome with pain. The thought of life ever being "normal" again for the Chapmans must seem impossible...unfathomable. Daily they will face reminders of their sweet daughter, whose life was stolen before it's time. Before...my time...not God's time.

Several years ago I had a motto: "I'm going to thrive in 2005". I wanted my life to exemplify and give witness to the verse, that Christ came to give us life - and give it to the full. I wanted to travel from insecurity to confidence. From fear to faith. From inadequacy to accomplishment. From worthless to value. I had dreams of moving from the mundane to the miraculous. I was going to live life abundantly. I was going to thrive!

But, what about when surviving alone is the great success? Beth Moore writes, "Sometimes life is so atrocious that surviving is its own great achievement and a strange proof of sorts that God must exist." Have you ever considered surviving in itself a crowning achievement? Maybe some of you reading this right now are all to familiar with this concept. Maybe you are hanging on by a thread, but at least you're hanging on. You have been dealt a bitter blow - one not expected, that hit you on the blind side. Maybe your loss has been great. Possibly you are walking a living death. A phone call. A letter. A financial setback. A betrayal. Life can change in an instant.

In mere seconds the Chapman family has been changed forever. Laughter that filled their home has suddenly become a stranger. How can they celebrate their oldest daughter's engagement and their sons high school graduation this weekend? How can they be expected to give thanks in all things? How can they keep serving Him?

BECAUSE GOD IS GOOD. The things allowed to touch our lives are not always good, but that doesn't change God's character. God is good! Am I trusting God because of His blessings? Have I got a qualifer on my relationship with Him? Lord, if You bless me, then I will love, serve and follow You. I can't place conditions on God. He grieves with us in our pain. He cherishes our tears and treasures them. He knows our struggle, as One well-acquainted with sorrow.

The answers I seek may never come this side of heaven. Will my faith still stand? Yes, because the same God who is now holding Maria in His arms, is holding my life in His hands, and although I will never fully understand His plans I can trust His heart.